Mitch and his wife Becky were watching a TV cop show where a female cop runs down and subdues a male robber. She tackles him and puts him in a hammerlock and then cuffs him.
Mitch laughs saying that's ridiculous.
The wife asks why??.
He says no woman can take down and subdue a man like that.
The wife asks why not??.
Mitch says because men are stronger than women. There's know way a guy could lose a fight to a woman like that.
Becky asks you don't think I could get you in a hold that you couldn't get out of??.
C'mon honey, Mitch says, be real. I'm bigger and stronger than you. There's no way you could beat me in a fight.
Do you want to see, she asks.
What are you serious- you want to fight me?? he asks..
Yeah, she answers.
Mitch says Man to man, no holds barred??.
Becky quickly answers Woman to man, no holds barred. And I promise I won't have to take any cheap shots to your balls.
Her husband was intrigued and said what makes you think you're stronger than me??.
Becky says I work out three times a week. I jog several miles a week. I take dance and aerobics. I'm in much better shape than you. You have a desk job, you come home and sit in front of the TV and quite frankly you've been getting soft.
Mitch says but I'm so much bigger than you. I outweigh you by 60 pounds and. I'm six inches taller.
I know, that also works to my advantage, said Becky. You'll be winded and out of breath in minutes - and then you won't be able to defend yourself against anything I want to do.
Okay, he says. What are the rules. How do we know the winner??.
The first one to submit or have their shoulders pinned to the mat for ten seconds loses.
And what does the winner get??, Mitch asks.
Just the satisfaction of who the stronger sex is in this family, Becky smiles.
Mitch agrees, figuring there's know way his little wife will be able to hold him still on the mat for ten seconds. And there's no way she's strong enough to make him submit.
The match is set. They clear out the basement and put down mats and make shift ropes for a ring.
Mitch is waiting for Becky to come downstairs the night of the fight.
She arrives and steps through the ropes wearing a bathrobe. But when she drops the robe he sees she's wearing the skimpiest string bikini.
"Nice fighting togs," Mitch laughs - as he feels his manhood begin to react - knowing that he's getting the chance to wrestle and pin this sexy woman.
"I just want you to know from the very beginning that you are fighting and being beaten by a woman," Becky coos.
They start off coming to the center of the ring. Becky puts up her hands as if challenging her husband to lock fingers and have a test of strength.
Mitch is a little hesitant even though he has a big height advantage.
Becky takes the momentary hesitation and grabs Mitch's wrist. She pulls him into her and spins around behind him. In a second she has his left arm in a hammerlock - being pushed up his back.
"This is how a woman can get a man into a hammerlock," she whispers in his ear. "Just like the lady cop did on TV."
Mitch tries to break the hold, but the pressure from his wife is too strong. He's surprised she is muscling him to the side of the ring to the ropes.
"Poor baby, can't get out of this," she taunts. "I thought you were too big and strong to get yourself in a situation like this."
Not only did the hammerlock hurt, but Becky's words were cutting into Mitch's male ego. He tried and tried to bend his arm back straight, but his wife's hold was too strong.
She now had him pinned against the ropes and was pushing his arm further and further up his back. The pain was intense.
"I can make you submit right now," Becky sneered. "But that would be too quick. I don't want to win in less than one minute because you'd think it was some kind of fluke and wouldn't accept the fact that I can beat you up."
Mitch couldn't take the taunting and was getting very angry. He tried again with all the muscle he could muster to break the hold. But his wife kept up the pressure.
"Tell you what, sweetheart," she cooed. "I'll let you go."
Mitch was embarrassed that his wife was taking pity on him and letting go of her arm-breaking hold.
Becky released the hammerlock but before Mitch's arm could slide down his back - Becky kept him pinned against the ropes and locked her arms around his neck. .
Mitch tried to push back from the ropes but he couldn't budge her. He wondered how is this 110 pound woman able to keep him pinned.
She whispered in his ear that she was now going to show him how she could knock him out.
Mitch felt her arms under his chin - pressing against his neck and her other arm locked in on his head. He felt her soft sexy body pressing against his back - but he also felt the blood leaving his head.
Mitch struggled to get his wife off his neck but he was getting more woozy by the second.
When Becky felt his struggling had stopped she whispered in his ear "now to show how a lady cop can bring down a big tough guy and pin him to the ground."
Becky dropped the sleeper hold, and Mitch was so woozy he couldn't do anything. Becky reached around his left leg, and his stomach and pulled backward.
Mitch was so groggy from the battle - that was now only three minutes old - that he offered no resistance. His mind was saying "C'mon man she's right there tackle her to the ground."
But it was Becky who was doing the tackling. She fell backwards, bringing Mitch down. He smacked his head on the mat - and if he wasn't near unconscious before he was close to it now.
Becky got up and surveyed the damage. Her husband was sprawled on the mat and she could do anything she wanted.
"So much for your muscles and size advantage champ," she laughed. "I can pin you right now for at least ten seconds - but again that would be too easy - and again I want to totally demolish you so there's no doubt in your mind who is the stronger sex."
Mitch heard her words through the fog of being dropped on the mat and the sleeper hold. His brain demanded that his arms and legs respond - and fight back - but the battle with his wife had taken just about everything his body had.
Becky said "time for more pain." And with that she rolled her husband onto his stomach and put him in a Boston crab hold -- bending his back in an awkward position.
"OOOWW," Mitch screamed out in pain.
"Do you submit," Becky yelled. "Say it. Say it. Give in," she commanded.
"I can break your back," she warned.
Mitch was helpless. His wife in the last eight minutes had put him in one hold after another - and wracked his body with pain that he never felt before. However he couldn't not let the words of "I give," come to his lips.
His male ego refused to admit his little wife beat him up.
"Okay," Becky said. "You still don't believe I beat you."
She switched over to a scissors hold, squeezing Mitch's ribs.
Mitch punched her thighs hoping to get her to loosen her vice-like grip on his chest. He felt his ribs being pushed in and his breathing was being compromised.
Becky laughed "You're punches are weak. Just as I thought - you have no stamina, and now you can't even hurt me with your fists."
Mitch was getting angrier with each taunting word - and he took a good smack at Becky's stomach. However there was no effect.
Becky said " I'm can crack your ribs to get you to submit but that would mean you'd miss work."
Mitch kept punching Becky's thighs - but he felt his fists hitting taut muscles that showed great definition as she applied pressure to his chest. He felt like a python had him.
"Do you want to give in now, Mitch," Becky asked. "I don't want to hurt you."
Mitch still would not admit that his wife had beaten him. However looking back at the last ten minutes - he realized this was a pretty one sided fight - and he was on the losing end.
Becky gave one more squeeze - and Mitch let out a loud groan.
She then let go of her scissors hold and stood over her defeated husband. She bragged "Now you know how a female cop can bring down a tough guy."
"However," she added, according to the rules of our match I haven't won yet. You've yet to submit and I haven't pinned you for ten seconds."
With that Becky gave a flying crash onto Mitch's body which was sprawled on the mat. He let out a loud whoof as her 110 pounds landed on his stomach and chest. She got up and looked at him and did it again.
The two flying body slams did it. Mitch had nothing left. His wife had beaten him to the point where his arms and legs were just sprawled out on his side, and although the male ego side of his brain was screaming for him to fight back - the muscles and pain center part of his brain knew his body had nothing left.
Becky then laid on top of Mitch's prone body.
She then ticked off each minute of the fight - giving a play-by-play:
"I could have submitted you with the hammerlock in one minute. I could have rendered you unconscious with the sleeper hold after three minutes. I could have submitted you with the Boston Crab after seven minutes. I could have submitted you with the leg scissors after ten minutes. However each one of those holds would have caused damage - and you need to go to work Monday."
Mitch heard her words - and he still couldn't believe his wife demolished him in their battle of the sexes.
"So to win this fight," Becky said, I'm simply going to pin you to the ground for ten seconds. You want to count with me," she laughed.
Becky held Mitch's body down.-- this was the part that he was sure would never happen -- having his 110 pound wife dominate his male muscles. He thought he would be able to throw her off - but he couldn't.
With each number 1-2-3...she counted off, whispering in his ear. He tried to move. But her arms pinning his shoulders were too strong. She continued 4-5-6-7...slowing the count to a point that said I'll give you more time to try to get me off you.
But she knew Mitch was done. His body was beaten...8-9-10....and now his male ego was bruised.
Becky got off her husband leaving him on the mat. After ten minutes he began to move. His arms, shoulder, back, neck and ribs were sore.
He looked at his wife sitting on the floor of the mat in her corner - knowing that their relationship was changed forever.